How to Dress Like a Protester
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As the prospect of 'public disorder' looms over the City and Canary Wharf, the question is: how exactly does one dress down to blend in with those who are being publicly disorderly?
Just about all staff at all banks are being urged to dress down on the 1st (no joke) and 2nd of April so that they won't attract any attention while G20 protesters are voicing their opinions in the financial districts.
First things first: I don't have an issue with peaceful protest. In a democracy, everyone has the right to express what they think, in particular if they have reason to complain. However, a protest that is scheduled to include burning effigies of bankers in front of the Bank of England might not just be a peaceful expression of discontent. Hence, public disorder (which in this country is a euphemism for what anyone would call "a riot") is expected.
And so to protect ourselves, we should dress to blend in. That leads me to my conundrum: what do I need to wear to look like an anarchist?
As one banker stated in the Independent, "Dressed down bankers wear a shirt, jumper, chinos and deck shoes. It makes us stick out more…" Deck shoes aside, that means my usual "Thank God it's Friday" outfit is ruled out.
What are the alternatives? Jeans? Sneakers? A hoodie (and then trying to avoid getting hugged by David Cameron)?
I feel that I have lost touch with society since I don't even know what to wear to a riot anymore.
Then again, globalisation protests have fizzled out over the last years. To get me up to speed on style options, I could look up some YouTube footage of the Trafalgar Square riots, but they were a few years ago and fashion has changed since then. I don't want to look like an anarchist that has not moved on from Y2K because that won't give me any street cred either. (Where did those globalisation opponents disappear to anyway? I suspect they were too busy riding the bull market and sipping Frappucinos to go out and thrash their local Starbucks.)
I will just have to assume that torn jeans and Converse will be good enough to blend in, but just in case I will bring along an effigy (of the non-burning variety) in case somebody questions my loyalty.
And I will hope that the rioters have not organised to wear pinstriped suits to their disorder party. Because then we would stick out like sore thumbs, and poorly-dressed ones at that.
First things first: I don't have an issue with peaceful protest. In a democracy, everyone has the right to express what they think, in particular if they have reason to complain. However, a protest that is scheduled to include burning effigies of bankers in front of the Bank of England might not just be a peaceful expression of discontent. Hence, public disorder (which in this country is a euphemism for what anyone would call "a riot") is expected.
And so to protect ourselves, we should dress to blend in. That leads me to my conundrum: what do I need to wear to look like an anarchist?
As one banker stated in the Independent, "Dressed down bankers wear a shirt, jumper, chinos and deck shoes. It makes us stick out more…" Deck shoes aside, that means my usual "Thank God it's Friday" outfit is ruled out.
What are the alternatives? Jeans? Sneakers? A hoodie (and then trying to avoid getting hugged by David Cameron)?
I feel that I have lost touch with society since I don't even know what to wear to a riot anymore.
Then again, globalisation protests have fizzled out over the last years. To get me up to speed on style options, I could look up some YouTube footage of the Trafalgar Square riots, but they were a few years ago and fashion has changed since then. I don't want to look like an anarchist that has not moved on from Y2K because that won't give me any street cred either. (Where did those globalisation opponents disappear to anyway? I suspect they were too busy riding the bull market and sipping Frappucinos to go out and thrash their local Starbucks.)
I will just have to assume that torn jeans and Converse will be good enough to blend in, but just in case I will bring along an effigy (of the non-burning variety) in case somebody questions my loyalty.
And I will hope that the rioters have not organised to wear pinstriped suits to their disorder party. Because then we would stick out like sore thumbs, and poorly-dressed ones at that.
Here Is The Writer : Square Mylo
Square Mylo came to London with the intention of staying six months and never left. He has worked in Canary Wharf and in the Square Mile, but still maintains a clear conscience since he's never worked in Mayfair. Being a banker is his true calling. Maybe he should have listened more closely.
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