Corporate Intranets: A Stalker's Paradise
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When my colleagues ask why I’m not on Facebook, I laugh and joke and respond that “it’s a stalker’s paradise”.
Everyone agrees with this and the attention moves quickly to something else - at least for a while. I’m sure one day that someone would stand in front of my PC and demand I join the facade that is a social network of 'friends' if it wasn’t for the delightful fact that “Access Denied” would pop up on the screen, as if I were trying to download illegal p.rn.
The truth is that the prospect of becoming a Facebook 'member' is down-right scary. In my younger years I somehow seemed to attract many a male stalker through the office intranet, which has drastically put me off joining any public domain - ever. Perhaps I should have been flattered and put it down to my mother’s good genes, though when the population in the office is 95% male-dominated and brimming with testosterone, it’s hardly surprising. So I didn’t feel particularly special, just a little awkward at the number of fully-grown men’s offers I had to 'gracefully' decline, and subsequently bump into on a routinely basis either in the elevator, canteen, gym, shop, trading floor or worse still, an actual meeting.
And then there were those who I didn’t 'accidentally' bump into, but who actually had the bravado to come by my desk and introduce themselves (whilst I sat mortified and my male counterparts looked on entertained).
Whoever says, "Englishmen are shy" has most definitely never worked at an investment bank in the City. They most definitely do give their South African and Australian contemporaries a run for their money, and they are most definitely not lacking in the confidence department. I know, I’ve witnessed it.
So when the company posts your picture up on the intranet, be wary. Investment banks and Facebook have something in common - they both attract people that pretend to know you.
On the other hand, if you’re single and looking to meet Mr Money Bags, come work at the bank.
The truth is that the prospect of becoming a Facebook 'member' is down-right scary. In my younger years I somehow seemed to attract many a male stalker through the office intranet, which has drastically put me off joining any public domain - ever. Perhaps I should have been flattered and put it down to my mother’s good genes, though when the population in the office is 95% male-dominated and brimming with testosterone, it’s hardly surprising. So I didn’t feel particularly special, just a little awkward at the number of fully-grown men’s offers I had to 'gracefully' decline, and subsequently bump into on a routinely basis either in the elevator, canteen, gym, shop, trading floor or worse still, an actual meeting.
And then there were those who I didn’t 'accidentally' bump into, but who actually had the bravado to come by my desk and introduce themselves (whilst I sat mortified and my male counterparts looked on entertained).
Whoever says, "Englishmen are shy" has most definitely never worked at an investment bank in the City. They most definitely do give their South African and Australian contemporaries a run for their money, and they are most definitely not lacking in the confidence department. I know, I’ve witnessed it.
So when the company posts your picture up on the intranet, be wary. Investment banks and Facebook have something in common - they both attract people that pretend to know you.
On the other hand, if you’re single and looking to meet Mr Money Bags, come work at the bank.
Here Is The Writer : Accidental Accountant
Accidental Accountant is a twenty-something City girl parading the trading floors of investment banks, wondering everyday how she came to be here. She has been playing the corporate game for the last five years, has a passion for fashion, a fondness for partying, and a love/hate affair with City life. If you’ve ever thought you didn’t quite fit in, welcome to her world (and feel free to get in touch).
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