Why You've Been Inexplicably Dumped
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Contrary to what Loréal adverts tell us, there are pluses to getting older - wisdom, bigger pay cheques, decent holidays, a swanky postcode. But as we become increasingly selective about our homes, cars, clothes and food, we also can’t help getting pickier about our partners.
And in this aspirational age, it’s turning into an epidemic.
Maybe women have watched too much Sex and the City and believe that Mr Big is out there somewhere. Maybe men have been ogling those airbrushed strumpets in GQ for so long they believe that’s what real women look like. Either way, people’s shopping lists are far exceeding what they can afford in the dating market. As a consequence, otherwise savvy men and women are remaining perpetually single, always hunting for Mr/Miss Perfect.
The other day a friend revealed that he’d met a great girl. She was pretty, fun, had a sense of humour, the sex was great, things were almost perfect. There was just one thing - her taste in interior décor veered towards industrial steel/minimalist urban, while his was more antiques and fine Persian rugs. On that basis he decided she was never going to be The One. Have our tick lists got so long that we dump people on the grounds we might have a future argument about how to decorate the sitting room?
I know another guy who won’t countenance dating a woman who has large feet (over size five, he tells me). Why? He likes his girls on the petite side. No matter that the world’s supermodels all tramp around in size 7s at least. He has ruled out a dozen aspiring girlfriends after sussing out their (apparently too-large) shoes.
Women are at least as bad - and sometimes worse - when defining their Mr Perfect. A friend admitted recently that for a man to even qualify for a first date he had to be over 6ft, public school educated, and earning £100K+. No exceptions, no matter how charming, funny, clever or good looking.
Another has developed a habit of putting potential suitors through their paces quite ruthlessly. She took one bloke skiing and dumped him before the plane had even touched down at Heathrow because he had failed to negotiate a particularly tough off-piste section. She gave another man short shrift because he lacked the courage to bash a trout to death when they went fishing. "If he can’t even kill a bloody fish, how’s he going to defend me in the street?" she reasoned.
Being too flat chested, chewing too loudly, failing to pay your way, wearing brown shoes, driving the wrong car, being late more than once, not knowing how to pronounce 'penchant' - the list goes on and on.
It’s a wonder anyone manages to get hitched at all these days.
Maybe women have watched too much Sex and the City and believe that Mr Big is out there somewhere. Maybe men have been ogling those airbrushed strumpets in GQ for so long they believe that’s what real women look like. Either way, people’s shopping lists are far exceeding what they can afford in the dating market. As a consequence, otherwise savvy men and women are remaining perpetually single, always hunting for Mr/Miss Perfect.
The other day a friend revealed that he’d met a great girl. She was pretty, fun, had a sense of humour, the sex was great, things were almost perfect. There was just one thing - her taste in interior décor veered towards industrial steel/minimalist urban, while his was more antiques and fine Persian rugs. On that basis he decided she was never going to be The One. Have our tick lists got so long that we dump people on the grounds we might have a future argument about how to decorate the sitting room?
I know another guy who won’t countenance dating a woman who has large feet (over size five, he tells me). Why? He likes his girls on the petite side. No matter that the world’s supermodels all tramp around in size 7s at least. He has ruled out a dozen aspiring girlfriends after sussing out their (apparently too-large) shoes.
Women are at least as bad - and sometimes worse - when defining their Mr Perfect. A friend admitted recently that for a man to even qualify for a first date he had to be over 6ft, public school educated, and earning £100K+. No exceptions, no matter how charming, funny, clever or good looking.
Another has developed a habit of putting potential suitors through their paces quite ruthlessly. She took one bloke skiing and dumped him before the plane had even touched down at Heathrow because he had failed to negotiate a particularly tough off-piste section. She gave another man short shrift because he lacked the courage to bash a trout to death when they went fishing. "If he can’t even kill a bloody fish, how’s he going to defend me in the street?" she reasoned.
Being too flat chested, chewing too loudly, failing to pay your way, wearing brown shoes, driving the wrong car, being late more than once, not knowing how to pronounce 'penchant' - the list goes on and on.
It’s a wonder anyone manages to get hitched at all these days.
Here Is The Writer : Alice in Numberland
By day Alice crunches numbers at a banking colossus in Canary Wharf, and by night she devotes her time to studying the strange behaviours of the male species. In between she expands her collection of Agent Provocateur and runs marathons. Tell her what you think about dating in the City.
view more articles by Alice in Numberland
Article Comments & Ratings
David 10th Nov, 3:02pm
So true! I have always ridiculed this type of super selective behavior, but like it or not, I even find myself being more picky as the years go on.
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