The Soul Sister on Happiness: Part 1
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The Soul Sister's last article on happiness was well-read, and a few more questions have come in. So how about it? Two more parts on happiness. Here's Part 1.
At a recent Conference on Happiness & Its Causes, we arrived at a few conclusions:
Happiness is defined as a permutation of Joy
Happiness is also a feeling of Wellness in a physical and Spiritual sense, or a feeling of satisfaction and contentment.
This emotion that we all enjoy and strive for has been distorted by the media into an idea that happiness is something we can buy. But 'Shopping Happiness' is all too transient (as the newest must-have bag is replaced by another model), so we need to find different ways of becoming more contented for a longer period of time. A more balanced general outlook on life is key.
But happiness can be hard to come by, and to keep. Many young people feel they are entitled to happiness. Some feel inspired to want it for their fellow men and try to build a better society, then becoming disenchanted when Utopia doesn't emerge.
Happiness is always a by-product of another activity
There are no instant access routes to happiness. The young often have a good feeling and healthy intuition for what truly matters, but get discouraged quickly, since nobody tells them about the steps involved in reaching such long-term goals. But perhaps we can learn to begin on that path, one step at the time.
There are, of course, traditional ways to seek happiness. 'Being content with ones lot' (the stoic expression of the stiff upper lip) used to work, but that seems to have taken a battering lately with research showing that people simply aren't content with that any more. They have become aspirational, only they don't seem to know what to aspire to. Shopping just doesn't do it, and neither do eating or drinking, as the growing obesity and binge cultures show clearly.
Another traditional way was to look to the wisdom of the East - meditate, contemplate and learn that suffering and unhappiness is part of our existence and hence, has to be embraced and transcended. Buddhist have achieved this type of contentment for a long time indeed, and interest in Buddhism is growing in the West. But it is not an easy path to follow, and many get stranded on that way, feeling that they have to resign themselves to a life filled with bitterness.
Check in next week for Part II - New ways of thinking, and How to go about it.
To submit a question, email soulsister@hereisthecity.com. Unfortunately, she can't answer all questions or enter into correspondence.
Happiness is defined as a permutation of Joy
Happiness is also a feeling of Wellness in a physical and Spiritual sense, or a feeling of satisfaction and contentment.
This emotion that we all enjoy and strive for has been distorted by the media into an idea that happiness is something we can buy. But 'Shopping Happiness' is all too transient (as the newest must-have bag is replaced by another model), so we need to find different ways of becoming more contented for a longer period of time. A more balanced general outlook on life is key.
But happiness can be hard to come by, and to keep. Many young people feel they are entitled to happiness. Some feel inspired to want it for their fellow men and try to build a better society, then becoming disenchanted when Utopia doesn't emerge.
Happiness is always a by-product of another activity
There are no instant access routes to happiness. The young often have a good feeling and healthy intuition for what truly matters, but get discouraged quickly, since nobody tells them about the steps involved in reaching such long-term goals. But perhaps we can learn to begin on that path, one step at the time.
There are, of course, traditional ways to seek happiness. 'Being content with ones lot' (the stoic expression of the stiff upper lip) used to work, but that seems to have taken a battering lately with research showing that people simply aren't content with that any more. They have become aspirational, only they don't seem to know what to aspire to. Shopping just doesn't do it, and neither do eating or drinking, as the growing obesity and binge cultures show clearly.
Another traditional way was to look to the wisdom of the East - meditate, contemplate and learn that suffering and unhappiness is part of our existence and hence, has to be embraced and transcended. Buddhist have achieved this type of contentment for a long time indeed, and interest in Buddhism is growing in the West. But it is not an easy path to follow, and many get stranded on that way, feeling that they have to resign themselves to a life filled with bitterness.
Check in next week for Part II - New ways of thinking, and How to go about it.
To submit a question, email soulsister@hereisthecity.com. Unfortunately, she can't answer all questions or enter into correspondence.
Here Is The Writer : Annegret O'Dwyer
Annegret O'Dwyer is a psychotherapist who has had a practise in Harley Street for 10 years, and recently opened one in Southbank. She is accredited and licensed by the UKCP (United Kingdom Council of Psychotherapy) and the EAP (European Association of Psychotherapists). Her favourite book is How to be Happy by the Dalai Lama, and The Right to Speak by Patsy Rodenburg, and she likes spending her evenings at the cinema or theatre.
www.annegretodwyer.co.uk
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